Needless to say we didn't sleep all that great last night.
You really want to get it over with but when the time arises....well...the nerves set in and you wish it would just all go away.
We were up and about at 4:30 and right on over to the Surgery check in. They took him back immediately to PACU. I tried not to cry but it just couldn't be helped. Billy is the love of my life and to just hand him over to someone else.....to put his life and well being in someones hands other than mine....it is so scary.
After about 30 minutes I was able to go back with him to PACU. He was already hooked up to his IV and we just waited to meet everyone. The Anesthesiologist team is soooo nice. And very caring. We met a young doctor from the neurology team. Then Dr. Vivas came in to see us. Such a sweet doctor. And finally Dr. H came in and just gave us an update as to what all they were doing again and letting us know that he plans on taking his time so it should be about 8-10 hours.
Everyone explained everything else that would be happening. He would get two more ports while he is asleep and a lumbar drain. He gets to keep the drain for a few days and it will help with the swelling of the brain. The ports are to monitor his blood pressure, quick access to blood if they need them, etc. He will go straight to ICU after PACU and will be there for 24 hours. I'm not sure when I will get to see him again this evening but hopefully before he is moved to ICU.
As they started to wheel him away I couldn't help but start crying again. The Anesthesiologist put her arm around me and told me he was in great hands. Everyone has been wonderful and I just can't express enough how happy I am for this place and these amazing doctors. You never want to be in this position for sure but when there is a great team leading the way it does give you some comfort.
The latest update: He is doing great in surgery. Everything is going as planned. And hopefully only 4 more hours to go.
I can't wait to see him again...to hold his hand and just let him know how much he means to me.
We are both so thankful for all the prayers and kindness that everyone has shown and given us. I can't thank you enough. And I can't thank Kim and Randy enough for sitting here with me through this long day.
The surgery took 10 hours. A very long day of waiting for sure. The outcome of the surgery:
The tumor was a little bigger than thought. It was very vascular so they had to take a lot of time with the vessels. It was also a sticky tumor and was stuck to the brain. So that in its self was a delicate procedure. They did leave a sliver in there because it was attached to the facial nerve. They did not want to severe that nerve because it would of given him pernament facial paralysis. As it stands he is having some paralysis. The nurse in ICU said that it could take up to several months for that to get better. Not what we were hoping for. We had hoped there would not be any paraylsis at all. His hearing is totally gone in that ear. We knew that would be the case. And because of the severed balance nerve...he is having serious vertigo and can not open his eyes. This will take several months of recouperating until his right ear can step up to the plate and help with the balance issues.
It was very hard seeing him laying there and I being totally helpless. Not able to move him, take his pain away, or help me see or feel better. For me...it broke my heart. Once I started crying I couldn't stop. And looked like a blubbering idiot at the security desk trying to get a ride to the hotel. And then knowing I was going back there with out him. It hurts. I just want to be by his side and never leave. See here I go again crying...geesh...
Originally he was to be in ICU for 1 day but it is looking like 2 now. Not sure how that plays in with him going home in 5 days. It's going to be a long road ahead of him and I just hope he is ready to tackle it. I'm ready to cheer him on.
It's been a long day. I can't thank everyone enough that has been there for us, stood by us, prayed with us and just been thinking of him today. I know God was there with him all day. I could feel it. I am sorry that I couldn't reach out to everyone to keep you updated. So many people to get in touch with. I will be honest and say my brain is just not functioning on all cyclinders today. I hope this blog post will help with updating and just know we thank you so much.
For me....I'm heading to bed now so that I can be ready to visit him in the morning.
I promise to let everyone know how he is doing in the morning. Please continue to pray for him.
And PLEASE....remember....we are never given tomorrow...anything can happen to change the course of our lives.....enjoy each moment you have with your friends and family. Don't let the little things in life get in the way of you being happy and enjoying your family. Cherish each moment and each day.